Random Tuesday – Halloween Edition

How about another spin on the RTT?

Don’t know what I am talking about? Visit Keely over at the Un-Mom for all the info. She has all the answers… except how to live Drama Free.

Would someone please tell the FDP Berlin that the election is over and that we are all aware that they won more votes this time than ever before? SO maybe now is a good time to take your signs down from all over Berlin. They are detracting from the graffiti. (sorry to the non-German residents… we had an election weekend before last)

Does anyone else read the license plates of the cars around them and make words out of the letters? (crickets) OK, I must be alone here. Oh well, it’s not the first time.

Berlin plates start with a B then have a space and then two more letters and a few numbers. I can usually find something in this grouping such as B OY or B ed or B IG… sometimes BIG is even seen on correspondingly funny vehicles such as BIG ASS Trucks or itty bitty cars.

It really gets fun with some of the other German cities… Frankfurt is a “F”, so I’ve seen a couple “FU” plates. Potsdam is a “P” which can be interesting, but “LDS” for an area around Berlin just has me thinking about the Latter Day Saints, hmm. Maybe I’ll start taking pictures of the more funny versions… hmmm. Could be a blog post.

Recently I’ve been asked by a family member if the Germans celebrate Halloween. As I told her, we really haven’t seen much, although it seems to be growing. Last year we had a few Trick or Treaters but they don’t seem to “get it”. They just ring the bell and then hold out their bags when you open the door. Not even so much as a “Trick or Treat, smell my feet, give me something good to eat”. Oh, and no thank you or anything. (I remember this behavior from the four year olds… but here it is the twelve year olds too.)

I keep wondering what the sweet old German Omas (grandmas) are thinking when this happens at their doors…

Are there kiddie costumes in the stores? Not that I’ve seen. Do adults have parties? Not that I’ve been invited to. Will I have a party? No, I’ll be scuba diving in the crystal clear, blue waters of Tahiti for Halloween this year. (not that I’m excited or anything)

BUT I did get the grins as I walked into my local grocery store a few days ago. Storck products, maker of Nimms and Lach Gummies (fruity, chewy candies) had a display of bags with individually wrapped items inside! WOW! This is an improvement.

OK, I should start my work day. Today among other more boring things I will get to go shopping for gifts for clients. For a pregnant woman I’ve decided on some lovely foot and leg revival from LUSH, and another recipient will get a bottle of Veuve Cliquot Champagne. Fun job, eh?

Have a fantastic Tuesday!

Just because:
Uniting American Families Act – I really wish they would pass this bit of legislation. If so, Sweet No and I (as well as hundreds of thousands of other couples world wide) would once again have some rights.

Random Tuesday – To Infinity and Beyond… and Back.

It’s another Random Tuesday, and it’s a good thing because my brain is waaaaay tooooo scattered for coherent thought right now.

If you are of a like mind, go check out Keely… she shows us how it’s done.

Let me just say that moving sucks and we aren’t even really starting yet. The floors have all been sanded down to the beautiful wood and now the staining begins. My gawd it seems to take forever for stuff to dry. One room’s walls have required three coats of white to cover up the brightest/ugliest/saddest green you have ever seen!

Tonight we get our new basement cleaned and set up for the big move. Hopefully we can get everything shifted over as well. Let’s just say that I’m increasingly surprised exactly how much SCUBA diving CRAP we have. But this cellar space is larger than the last one, so we’ll be able to spread out a bit and hopefully have more than an area 6 inches wide to park my bike.

We had a fantastic time in Munich for the Whiney Expat Bloggers Meetup 2009. A great group of friends in a beautiful, clean, if a bit stuffy city. Munich has many claims to fame of course, but the one I found the funniest was the “We built our opera house on the world’s first beer tax” to be a bit over the top. I had my first Maß which as far as I can tell is just a HUGE mug of watery beer. Give me a Guinness any day.

The more I travel, the more I realize that cool/sexy/poor Berlin was the right choice for me. But the people are great in Munich and I would go back for a visit any time.

As of this moment I haven’t had enough time to read the instruction manual for my new camera. Unfortunately I think that this will be required. I’ve started twice but the thing is almost incomprehensible. WHY can’t someone actually write a manual that is in simple language and actually gives the owner some value?

Today Mimi and I turned over 3,500 KM on her odometer. I’m really loving the sweet little scooter and will really not be happy on the day she needs to be put away for winter. 😦

I didn’t get the filing gene – no matter what, I always need to go back to find things and am continually surprised by where things end up. If something were to happen to me tomorrow, I pitty the person who has to find things in my work filing system. Let’s not even get into what the folder with my photos looks like.

Now that gray hair has finally started to make its appearance on my head I don’t seem to be too happy about it. In fact, I caught myself standing at the bathroom mirror this morning pulling individual hairs. Am I crazy trying to fight against something which is going to happen no matter what?

Been reading:
Priorities Are Clear as Mud in Germany – With elections coming up it is interesting to see what Merkel’s administration is up to… or not up to.

Deutsche Bahn to Cut 75% of Berlin Train Services – There must be some nasty politicking going on here. WTF? This is the second maintenance “emergency shutdown” this summer! Somebody should hang pay! Where is our Mayor? Partying in Fuerteventura?

Astronauts pack Buzz Lightyear for ride home – OK, so he didn’t quite make it to “Infinity and Beyond”… but he was on the SPACE STATION! He’s probably my favorite cartoon character of all and knowing that astronauts think he’s cool too is a like a rocket boost for me. 🙂

OK, I’ll leave you with the Mean Kitty Song!
Every time I pass a “Sparta Bank” this song starts playing in my head.

Why socialisim when it comes to healthcare isn’t such a dirty word

Living in Germany has given me a new-found perspective on the whole socialism angle. Like most Americans I was brought up to believe that it was evil and would lead to the downfall of any economy leaning on socialism’s tenuous tinderbox base. But a few years in a country which is not only living well under a modified form of socialism, but also thriving has opened my eyes.

Right now America is in the throes of trying to fix its fractured health care system. One thing for certain, no matter what is done, it is going to be painful for some. It is going to be painful for the taxpayers (at least at first). It is going to be painful for the elected officials who must decide what is right. And it is going to hurt doctors in the pocketbook. But trust me on this. It is NOT going to be painful for the insurance and pharmaceutical companies. No, they are now pumping so much lobbying money into our Congressmen’s pockets in order to maintain their own interests, that sincerely I doubt if anything changes at all unless it is advantageous for the insurance and pharma industries.

I would like to take just a moment to point out a blogger friend’s series on Universal Health care in Germany and the differences between here and America. I know that it will involve reading, but I suspect that it is information which every American should know while trying to make an informed decision.

Here is just an excerpt:

How do health statistics compare between Germany and the US?

Looking at the World Health Organization’s Core Health Indicators, Germany has better numbers than the US in most health care related statistics. Here are some highlights:

• Life expectancy at birth, for both sexes combined, is 80 years in Germany and 78 in the US
• Healthy life expectancy at birth, for both sexes combined, is 72 years in Germany, 69 years in the US
• Infant mortality rate (per 1000 births) for Germany is 4.0, the US is 7.0
• Hospital beds (per 10000 people) is 83 in Germany and 32 in the US
• Physician density (per 10000 people) is 34 in Germany and 26 in the US
• Total expenditure on health as percentage of GDP for Germany is 10.7%, the US is 15.2%
• and Per capita expenditure on health is $3250 in Germany and $6350 in the US

Scary isn’t it?
Please take a moment and visit AmiExpat’s site for more information.

• Her first in the series was a description of the health care system in Germany.
• The second was her own experiences in the German and the US systems,
• Third up was reader submitted experience with health care in Germany.
• The fourth post was experiences with universal health care around the world.
• A fifth post is asking those living in the German system to talk about their experiences.

Think about this folks: America has the 37th worst quality of health care in the developed world. And the most costly. Costing over twice as much as every other county. Conservative estimates are that over 120,000 people die each year in America from treatable illness that people in other developed countries don’t die from. Rich, middle class, and poor alike. Insured and uninsured. Men, women, children, and babies. This is what being 37th in quality of health care means.

Personally I have two brothers who are as of right now uninsured. One is “underemployed” one is self-employed, and both are unwilling (read unable) to fork out the extra dough required for personal insurance. It scares me to think about it, but if something serious happened to either one of them, it could mean foreclosure on their houses. I myself rode the no-insurance wheel in America for a long time when I was either in between jobs or was only working part time.

What else should you do to make an informed decision before following the herd…? Read! Here is HR 3200, in its entirety.

I think I will write out my own experiences with German health care, but I’m afraid that will have to wait for a day or two. But if you didn’t visit the links above, please do reconsider.

Random Tuesday – Wednesday Edition … now THAT’s Random.

OK, so I’m LATE! Get off me! Work is crazy and my home life is … well, let’s say busy.

Why, you ask, is your personal life so busy Snooker? Because we are moving. No, not back to America (ahem, not on your life)… No, not to a nice warm climate such as Barcelona like ex-blogger Diane, the Martinis for Two lady. NO… we’re NOT off to some nice paradise on a tropical island to be a Scuba Divemaster/Instructor team…

None of those things. We are moving ACROSS THE STREET. Yes, all the trials and tribulations of moving without the moving truck. Expenses, uprooting and just general mix up of course, but we will basically still be living on the same street. We will have the same view out of our windows, but from the other side. A little silly, eh?

Well we WILL get more space and a nicer building (for those Berliners reading we’re moving into an Altbau) which has been built and rebuilt twice in the last 100 years. The heating and plumbing is newer and more up to date, the basement storage area is twice as big (allowing more room for diving equipment) we will get a nice winter garden with multiple use possibilities (do we put the dining room table in there, or go for a reading room?) AND all of this for the same price per square meter without windows which act more like screens.

Prepare for more moving whining stories as time goes on.

Speaking of whining, summer is ending. My daily scooter morning commute now includes wearing the motorcycle jacket in the interest of not freezing my ass off. May I just say that I really don’t like wearing this restrictive straitjacket?

While I do understand the safety qualities, I somehow can’t get accustomed to the loss of air movement. There is just something to be said for cruising down the street at 45kph with the wind whipping my clothes around.

Which brings me to yesterday. Imagine Snooker in a bright salmon button down linen blouse complete with collar. Put that Snooker on a bright blue scooter moving at city traffic speeds. Now open your mind’s eye to the amount of wind we are talking about as I cruise along. Something about how the air whips around the collar causes the ends to flip up and down… at times VERY fast… most of the time moving up and down in such a way as to hit my collarbone then jump up to the bottom of the helmet. As you might have guessed, I get quite a few bemused looks, even from the normally dour-looking Berliners. (I’m just happy to have made your day, people)

The folks at the Berlin Hooters have missed the idea that the waitresses should have HOOTERS. Ahem, I think it will get tiring for the average big-eyed German guy to have his beer delivered by a pretty blonde if there really isn’t any chest to stare at. He might actually end up thinking about the crappy service. Sorry ladies, but your wholesome good looks aren’t going to carry you the whole way through life. Learn a skill, because generally from what I’ve experienced in the two times I’ve visited… you suck at waitressing.

As a former boss used to say… “They’re not turning away Harvard graduates, you know”.

Having said that, I must admit that tonight I will once again visit the sacred home of wings. This time I hope that they don’t screw up my order and if they do let’s have them bring too much food to the table the same way they did last time. I’ll be taking my discerning Frenchie foodie office-mate to the temple of greasy American bar food. Yes, he has been warned. Oh, did I mention he is gay? YUP, either he will be impressed with the food or he is going to have a shit time tonight. Oh well, I’ve warned him several times.

My wife has a date tonight… and I am not involved… should that bother me?

Oh yeah, back to moving (only for a second… geeze). We bought a new toilet seat because Sweet No refuses to sit on one which has touched any one else’s booty. (yeah, the same girl who every morning would throw her pjamas on the bathroom floor in front of the human toilet and beside the cat toilet) Back to the toilet seat, OK? It is really cool with dolphins on it and EVERYTHING!

What do we find when we go to check out the new apartment yesterday? The last tenant had already bought us a new one… a white one… and had removed the one which was on the toilet… how goofy/scary/strange is that? Perhaps he couldn’t stand the thought of anyone else’s booty on HIS seat. Um, yeah. Oh shit, I forgot to check if it is a German shelf toilet.

Inspired by others using Google Analytics to come up with blog fodder, I thought I would check it all out. I signed up and aside from now being positive that nobody is actually reading this crap… I did get something interesting… search terms. People search for the weirdest stuff:

1. bathroom manners germany – um, pretty much the same as America… except the guys are expected to sit down. It’s called “Sitzpinkel”. Don’t ask me… I’m a girl, living with a girl.

2. berlin do re mi – Um no, you want Salzburg

3. berlin brothel girls pics – Interesting, but you’re definately disappointed here

4. black man use his cock for sonoker stik – I wouldn’t touch that with a 10 foot pole

5. christmas in october – ?

6. deep happy stuff in berlin, germany – HA! It’s ALL deep happy stuff here

7. don’t you just love sunny days – Why yes, I do

8. how can you tell when someone drinks alot – HEY! how did you end up here with that?

9. what is goofey mood – Definition … Snooker

10. you always put a smile on my face and a skip in my step – Well thanks, I do my best.

and the best of all:
an american living the dream in berlin – You betcha baby!

Even though Keely is on holiday, you should head on over to the Un-Mom’s blog to see what is going on. She is the one that came up with the whole Random Tuesday thing, and she should be thanked. I enjoy the thought that the theme she left for her guest bloggers was “naked”. Go see how they do.

Been reading:

Health care system ‘inhuman’, ‘stupid’ – I get the feeling that fools like Limbaugh and Palin think that their smart-assed way of railroading the American people out of much-needed health care reform is a great thing to do. Reading “End of life” counseling as some kind of euthanasia program is just silly partisan witless thinking. Comparing these programs to the “selective medicine” program of Nazi Germany is incomprehensible and uninformed to say the least. I’m not saying that Obama’s administration’s bill is perfect, but at least they are trying, which is more than I can say for the last party in power.

Senate ‘pillar’ Edward Kennedy gets Medal of Freedom – I remember meeting Teddy Kennedy one sunny day in 1976 as my family was vacationing in Washington D.C. My father and I popped out of the car and dad asked Senator Kennedy if it would be OK to take a picture with his daughter. He stopped his conversation and turned for the picture, putting his arm around me with his hand on my shoulder (cold and clammy – ICK). When we popped back into the car my father (at that time a Democrat) proudly proclaimed, “That man may be President very soon”, which earned him a stern look from my (Republican) mother.
No, he never made it to the White House although he did run a few times. In retrospect, however, I would assume that Teddy Kennedy did a lot more for the American people from his 47 years in the Senate seat.
On a side note – look on the left side of that article and you will see the other people who will also be awarded the Medal of Freedom, among them Billie Jean King and Harvey Milk.

I’ll leave you with a funny that makes me laugh.

FRIDAY BABY!

So let’s start with a little Foto Madness!
This shot was taken outside of a cute little store in Heidelberg. My GOSH they had some adorable, highly colored trinkets and playthings. But standing guard at the (closed, yes it was Sunday in Germany) door were these two delightful guys.

Normally I would call this a Funny Foto Freitag, something I got from 50% of My DNA, but my friendly neighborhood science teacher is MIA. She’s disappeared folks! I’m sure she’s off having a great time (read, A LIFE) and will return soon. So I’ll play her little game without her for a while.

Sweet No and I spent last weekend in Heidelberg checking out the sights, marveling at the 800 year old castle, enjoying the charming old part of the city, and among others, met up with the sweet, charming Heidelbergerin and her tall (remember, I’m horribly short… lots of people are TALL) and funny Heidelberger-man.

When No and I were talking about a visit to Heidelberg she started joking and saying that now I would be a true American in Germany, because it seems that ALL Americans want to visit Heidelberg. She couldn’t explain the phenomena, just said that it is the common stereotype. Often when Germans are traveling they will run across an American who upon learning they are speaking with a German will be ask if the German is from Heidelberg or has been to the city. No matter the answer, the American usually goes off into a “my father was there in the Cold War, my brother visited in the 60’s, my Grandfather said it was the most beautiful city in Europe” kind of thing.

Why is this? I’m not really sure. Perhaps the relation is from the Cold War. My father WAS stationed NEAR Heidelberg (along with a good percentage of the U.S. Army in that time period – even Elvis was here) and brought back reels and reels of slides from the area. Every time we had visitors, my Dad would bring out the slides for a show. He had many pictures of Heidelberg and the surrounding area, but he had taken the opportunity to get around, so there were pictures from Belgium, France, many locations in Germany, Austria, Switzerland, and I believe at least a few from Italy.

But does this off-hand correlation with Heidelberg really justify that well over 50% of the tourists I saw (and heard) were American? I have no idea how this could work out. Maybe it is because Heidelberg is one of the few German cities which were spared the highly destructive carpet bombings meant to bring Germany to its knees and end WWII. Maybe it is the 800 year old ruin castle? Perhaps they come in droves to see Germany’s longest pedestrian shopping area? YES, a HUGE outdoor mall, complete with Starbucks and other strange choices to be seen in such an old environment. Now THAT sounds like something which would interest my countrymen!

I kid you not, every few steps while walking along the main thoroughfare I was assaulted by English. I say assaulted because after being surrounded by German (and at work French, Spanish and Italian) my ears act like a strange English antennae and almost jump up when my native tongue is within earshot. At the office I know that people are speaking to me when they begin speaking English thus when I hear English, I assume that the person is wanting to speak with me. I’ve talked about this weird phenomenon before in a long ago blog entry titled Sensory Overload which is exactly what it feels like to me.

How could I not listen to the couple sitting behind us at the restaurant as they discuss what they will do/see next? Is it really possible to blank out the noise of a passing pedestrian as he asks the woman beside him if she “would you qualify that as a manufacturing problem or a design problem”? In one word… No. It is impossible for me to tune them out. It is the same thing I deal with every time I visit America or any English-speaking country. It is HARD, so HARD to deal with the language all around me.

While walking among the white sport shoed folks (stereotypical American footwear makes them stand out every time) I took the time to eat some local fare. In this case it was Saumagen or “stomach of the female pig”. It turned out to be alright, tasting like most any of the sliced deli meats widely available in the US, just sliced more thickly and pan-fried. I tasted potatoes and celery in this interesting reminder that the Germans use EVERY part of the pig in cuisine. The Saumagen came with Sauerkraut and Kartoffelpüree (mashed potatoes) of course, both were also quite nice and rounded out the meal very nicely.

At the suggestion of the before-mentioned Heidelbergerin, we avoided Vetter’s restaurant food and went straight to the beer. It seemed like every third person was walking around with the easily-spotted brown bottle and enjoying it highly, so we decided it was the thing to do when in Heidelberg… OH MY… we were right! We walked in and asked for a dark beer and came out with a FANTASTIC dark, sweet, thick malt beer which went down smoothly as we sat on the riverbank opposite the old town and watched the sunset/moonrise.

A friend of mine told me that Heidelberg is very romantic, and now I believe him. It seemed that the best times we had were on the “other” side of the river, taking in the quiet beauty of the incredibly picturesque villiage of the old town. There were so many opportunities for simply enjoying each other’s company which in our hustle and bustle world just get left behind. We really enjoyed our time by the Neckar river, on both sides.

Been reading:

• Former Blackwater CEO Erik Prince – Now the dirty stuff is going to come out about Blackwater (now renamed Xe). I wonder why you would change the name of a successful company? Is it because the other one was kicked OUT of Iraq BY the Iraqis?
• Churning Ocean Waters, One Jellyfish at a Time – This is a really wild theory, but I can see where it originates from and it makes sense in a way. The first thing I thought while reading this is that this is just another species that once extinct or severely reduced in number due to environmental stupidity on the part of humans that will have a HUGE and unforeseen impact on the Earth.
• Russian Subs Seen Off U.S. East Coast – Looks like Mother Russia is getting more serious about throwing around some military might.
• Don’t trust Obama on gay marriage – I believe the author has hit the issue on the head. Obama will sell out the gays and lesbians in a heartbeat if it is politically advantageous for him to do it. Clinton did it first of course, but he did it best… DOMA and Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell hurt gays and lesbian rights in ways that we are just now fully realizing. Let’s hope that Obama doesn’t make another such “compromise” which undercuts the small gains the gay community has made.

I will leave you with a cute video which has become pretty viral.
THIS is the way to come down the aisle!

On Harry and Hairy German Situations

I’m so excited that I’m a bit afraid I will burst. (well, not literally… come on… stop TAKING ME LITERALLY!)

Harry Potter and his crew of meddling Gryffindors are coming to a big screen near me… and I have tickets! Yeah, yeah I know it is a bit childish to be so excited, especially when this movie is about the book I liked the least out of the series. But I really enjoy Harry’s world, and I look forward to stepping back into it this evening.

Tonight will also serve as another milestone. This evening after work as I make my way to the Harry Potter flick, Mimi (the name of my Vespa Scooter… don’t you name your vehicles? you don’t? silly you, it’s more fun) and I will have logged a total of 3,000km (1,184 miles) since we being rescued from Scooter Hell in the fall of 2007. As we rolled to a stop this morning, her odometer read 2,999.06. All of that and my butt isn’t even sore!

Speaking of Mimi adventures (and really, there are many although I don’t chronicle them here for fear that my Sweet No will read them and forbid me from riding.), this morning I was getting petrol/gas/benzine (yeah, one five liter tank lasts over a week – love it!) I pulled up alongside a sexy-looking Mercedes two-seater. Behind slinky and brown was a 50-ish looking man holding a gas nozzle in that position which I’ve always thought was slightly suggestive.

As I hopped off and stowed my helmet I realized that he was scrutinizing me. When I reached up for a paper towel to help control drips while filling I stole a glance his way and I caught him unabashedly staring at me. OK, no worries… I just stared right back at him as I returned to the scooter. Mimi got her fill of gasoline and I went inside to pay. Walking out I was shocked to see that he was strolling directly toward me, still staring intently, with his body between me and the scooter.

With a raised eyebrow I asked him (auf Deutsch of course) if I could help him, as he was now in my way. He told me that he had something to discuss with me. I motioned to follow and then walked around him in an attempt to get back to Mimi and a possible weapon if need be – just joking there.

Soon I was listening to a long diatribe about how I had picked the wrong type of gasoline to put into the scooter. It seems that Mimi was getting the store brand which was designed for “special vehicles” with a number rating of 100 (who knows if it is an octane rating or not – Germany doesn’t have “must display octane ratings” rules like America) and it simply would not do to put it into my Vespa. I didn’t know the word for Octane so my response was probably rather cloudy to him, but my explanation centered around the fact that my scooter gets high octane gas (as recommended by the manufacturer) so that it goes faster and starts more smoothly.

Mr. slinky car seemed to accept my not-necessarily coherent explanation and went on his way which relieved me as he was really intense and even though he was nicely dressed, his way of acting was a bit strange to me.

Which begs the question… Why do Germans feel that it is their right – no, duty – to tell me what they think I am doing wrong? Crossing the street against the light, standing on the bus in the wrong area, queuing incorrectly (perceived) for the grocery store, biking on the sidewalk on my way to park, all of them are a reason for telling me what they think I should rather be doing. Ask any Ausländer Mother (from another country) about walking the streets of Berlin and being told that her child needs a hat, doesn’t need a hat, should have a coat, shouldn’t have a blanket, too much wind will give the child who knows what ailment, or even just that they shouldn’t have a child that small on the back of a bicycle regardless of the efficiency of a child chair.

What makes Mr. I drive a piece of German engineering perfection such an expert about my Italian scooter when I’m quite positive that he’s never been on such a low-tier vehicle in his adult life?